Randall Scott Carries Out the Redhead's Plan

As the clock approached 2:00 am, boss #1 rolled from beneath the massive structure. Sweat trickled through the healthy serving of grease that liberally smeared his face, and we all took a step back, scrutinizing the product of our toil. Since our meeting with the Redheaded bombshell we had been working around the clock - at the office during the day and our makeshift laboratory by night. Our determination to slow global warming had culminated with the creation of the Icebergarator – yes, a maker of icebergs.

After running a myriad of tests involving fish bowls and ice cubes we discovered that ice + water = colder water. Standing eight feet tall and four feet wide, the Icebergarator makes giant ice cubes just able to fit in the bed of Boss #1’s truck. It was now after 2:00 am, but we mustered up enough energy to throw a group high-five before we parted ways for the night and let the Icebergarator make its bounty.

(Loading up the truck with the season's first berg)

The next morning we showed up rejuvenated with a few hours of sleep and excited with the pent up anticipation of our first ice-drop. It was the moment of truth, and before we peeked in the Icebergarator we looked at each other in a moment of reticence. That reticence was unfounded, as inside stood a sparkling iceberg worth its weight in gold. After loading up the Tundra, we hit the open road, heading West towards the Colorado River and the imminent demise of global warming.

“I can’t believe no one else has thought of this,” offered boss #2.
“Well, we’ll have to split some of the profits with the Readheaded bombshell,” said Boss #1
"That’s where you’re wrong,” I interjected, “the whole world will share in these profits – except the jellyfish.”

Laughter filled the truck as we sped towards our destination and immortality.

Unloading the berg was nothing more than a technicality as it effortlessly slid from the bed to the river. We watched as the berg did its job, slowly floating down the rapids and cooling the river, which cools the ocean, which cools the earth and ruins the diabolical plot of the nefarious jellyfish. Feelings of pride warmed our overworked bodies as the berg vanished around the bend, and boss #2 said, “we carve our logo into the next one.”