Year End Wrap Up

Me Last Christmas (with the nine fingers)


Well, we have a couple things to wrap up before 2008 kicks off, so this entry will be all over the place.



First: I only lost $150 at Foxwoods with the family over the holidays. For me that’s essentially like winning $650, as I estimate my usual trip to any casino results in donating at least $800.

It was my first trip to Foxwoods, and “the wonder of it all” must refer to the amazing fact that people go there more than once. If I’m going to lose my whole checking account, I want to do that in a place that’s 85 degrees with gorgeous women, not in rural Mass surrounded by people in snow suits. They did, however, have the most powerful toilets I’ve ever encountered – probably in case tenants ever have an urgent need to flush massive amounts of drugs in under 30 seconds.




Second: let’s congratulate the Patriots on a perfect regular season – and let’s thank God those bean bags from the 72’ Miami team may never sip champagne alone again.

There was a wonderful montage this weekend where all the princes from that Miami team, to the background music of a triumphant symphony, transparently growled into the camera announcing that, “if any team does, in fact, tie our record, we will be the first to welcome them to the mountain.” I’m surprised they weren’t clad in togas and sitting on a replica of Mt. Olympus. Somebody tell Larry Czonka I liked it better when I thought he was Dick Butkus - the owner of the diner in My Two Dads.




Third:
This hurts, but I have to concede my two-time-crown and congratulate the winner and runner-up to our office fantasy football season:

Winner: Travis (who I convinced against his wishes to take Tomlinson #1), our mechanic who builds bikes in the precisely methodical manner of Belichick.

Our Mechanic Travis (or me with some girls)


Brattles: The guy who’s soon to come in second in our annual moustache-off.



Good Luck getting paid fellas, and how did I lose with Brady and Moss on my team?



Fourth:
Don’t forget, the conclusion of our office moustache - off will be here shortly – stay tuned.

Fifth
Randall has been begging me to get him on the blog - so I pulled up an old college picture I took of him at a G&R concert in 87 at the Meadowlands.

Live Free or Die: Christmas Installment

As I embark on my voyage back to NH for Christmas, I have a lot to look forward to:


1) Chinese Food for Christmas Eve Dinner




2) Of Course my family (Our Christmas Vacation will be spent at Foxwoods losing all the cash we give each other for presents) Combine the Lampoons Christmas and Vegas Vacations and add Gin & Tonics, that’ll be us.

3) The 90 inch TV my Mom gave my Dad for last Christmas - that forces everyone to sit on the back wall of our 10x12 living room so they can see

4) Gary Tanguay and Mike Felger

5) The Red Sox winning the World Series

6) The Red Sox getting Johan Santana for anyone not named Jacoby*

7) The Patriots aka: the Best team in NFL History**

8) The Celtics being 20-2 and on pace to win 75 games***

I’ll leave you with a little email my cute, single, athletic, masseuse friend Blair sent me:

(Blair and I before some tennis and Bull Riding)



God asks Peyton Manning first: "What do you believe?"

Peyton thinks long and hard, looks God in the eye, and says,

"I believe in hard work, and in staying true to family and friends. I believe in giving. I was lucky, but I always tried to do right by my fans."

God can't help but see the essential goodness of Manning, and offers him a seat to his left.

Then God turns to Tony Romo and says, "What do you believe?"
Tony says, "I believe passion, discipline, courage and honor are the fundamentals of life. I, too, have been lucky, but win or lose, I've always tried to be a true sportsman, both on and off the playing fields."

God is greatly moved by Tony's sincere eloquence, and he offers him a seat to his right.

Finally, God turns to Tom Brady: "And you, Tom, what do you believe?"

Tom replies, "I believe you're in my seat."


* Knock on wood
** This is a scientific fact (Citiation needed)
*** Does anyone know if Bill Simmons still abhores Doc Rivers?

FREE COFFEE - Insert Coins

Holiday Stash OFF Accompanies Deal of the Day

The snowball effect has begun. Innocently, I grew a bad – a$$ pair of handlebars, and now everyone at the office is going Tom Sellek. So it begins, The First Annual Randall Scott Stash OFF.

(Yes this is my first appearance on the Blog, and yes, since I've had my stash I've gotten beaten up a lot less, and talked to 66% fewer ladies)


(General Manager Mishkin has gained confidence with his stash over the years and it's now an integral part of his socail and professional arsenal)




Because I had a marathon lead, and our general manager has had a distinguished stash since 91’ we evened the playing field and took the shears to our baby faces.

Now it’s just six guys in a race against the clock. Since we recently kicked off our 1st annual Holiday Deal of the Day, we were going to run one moustache in per day in conjunction with the sale.

Unfortunately, we didn’t leave ourselves enough time to have the appropriate breadth in our moustaches, during this sale.

The culmination of the Moustache off will be New Years 2008, with the winner winning lunch at Wendy’s for a week, paid for by the stash losers.

So check out some of these gross closeups and let the games begin.

Gross Closeups: